Seriously, I hate the way they look! I know there are lots of people who wear them. Hell, all I have to do is walk in for a pedicure on any given day and be reminded of their popularity. The Asian shop where I go has 487 manicure stations and 4 pedicure chairs. FOUR! If you give me a sec, I can spew some statistics.
Wait for it, wait for it.
Thanks! Yea, that's 99.2% of the stations for those silly-looking fake nails.
America, please. I implore you. Stop wasting your time and money on fingernails.
First of all, that drill thing they use can NOT be good for you. I just got chills imagining that sound. At least the dentist gives you anesthesia before he drills a hole in your teeth. Ain't no way I'm letting anyone with less than a medical degree get anywhere near me with a drill. ANYWHERE! Can we say "horrific finger trauma" just waiting to happen???
Secondly, all those chemicals! Lord, the smell! What the heck is that stuff?? It has to be killing your brain cells (and mine now that I think about it). Ever wonder why the nail techs wear little face masks??? They don't want to DIE. I don't know what a meth lab smells like but I bet it's got to smell better than those chemicals used to create those ridiculous appendages.
The end result?? Plastic-looking things that hang off the end of your fingers. Un-damn-natural. Those objects stand about 1/2 above the actual nail bed. Instead of the sleek line formed by an extended finger, there's this line then a "flip." That flip is what bugs me the most. The faux nail begins deep into the cuticle area then takes on a life form of its own. It looks like a tiny, little bike ramp.
So you suffer through the drill and the deadly chemicals for an hour of your valuable time and $50 of your hard-earned money, for what??? For some fingernails that, no matter how much you paid or to whom you paid it, do not look even remotely like the real thing! If the objective is not to get beautiful, well-groomed hands, then what is?!?
Dear Ms. Fake Nail Wearer, what is your motive? Why do you have this weaponry attached to your fingers? Must they be 30 inches long, painted that chartreuse color, and embellished with tiny American flags? How do you wipe? Or button your pants, for that matter?
Things that make me go hmmmm...
