Pick your chin up off the floor. It happens.
Lately, we've been getting it on. Lately, I can't seem to break away. Kind of like talking on the telephone with my first love. You hang up first. No you. I want to stop looking, but I'm scared I might miss something.
Until...David Downer shows up. And pees in the pool.
Everyone is all "Memphis in May rocked!" or "I saw Jake Gyllenhaal at Jazz Fest!" or "My kids won their soccer tournament." while David is all "What is everyone so damn happy about?? Obama is ruining our country, and your kids are fat."
Seriously?? It annoys the crap out of me how Jon Stewart-ish he tries to be. Don't get me wrong, I am a smart-ass. Sarcasm is how I roll. Furthermore, I can appreciate a fellow know-it-all. His comments, though, are often pretentious and, well, just...damn...snobbish.
I guess that's what bothers me the most. His comments just exude elitism. Like he's sitting at his computer thinking "Ha, ha, ha! I am so fabulous. My wife and kids are beautiful and adore me. I have a gazillion dollars in the bank. And you are NOTHING!"
I'm not sure why I don't delete him, though. I kind of enjoy disliking him. I think my need to get pissed off by his comments is what keeps bringing me back to FB. What the hell is he going to say next?
Or maybe I just feel sorry for him. Because his life really sucks. His wife is sleeping with her trainer. His kids are hellions that he can't stand to be around. He's 52 gazillion dollars in debt and one payment away from foreclosure.
As with everything, I'm sure my obsession with Facebook and David Downer will wane. My ADD doesn't allow me to stick with anything for too long. For the time being, though, I wonder if he's pissed that Bin Laden's body isn't hanging from a flag pole in front of the White House???
