Who Is This Person???

Do you ever look at the person you've become and wonder, "How in the world did I get here??"

I am home today because my baby girl's birthday party is tomorrow. I stayed home to get my house in order and get things "ready" for the party. This year's party has a TinkerBell theme. Now you'd think, what's the big deal? It's just a 3 year old's birthday party. Get a cake, some ice cream, a few balloons and party hats, and your set. Right??? Oh, NO!

Instead, birthday parties at my house have become full-blown celebrations that require months of planning and preparation. The invitations have to be just right. There must be enough food to feed 400 people. The "setting" has to be perfect so that my house is transformed into a magical place for fairies and pirates. Lastly, you can't forget the favors that cost nearly as much as the celebrity gift bags given to presenters at the Academy Awards ceremony.

When I was child, birthday parties were backyard barbeques with cake and ice cream. The kids ran around the yard while the parents camped out in lawn chairs with coolers full of beer. If it was really hot outside, someone might pull the slip-n-slide out. Some guests brought gifts, but quite a few brought pjs or toys still in the Wal-Mart sack. There were even the few that actually "forgot" to bring a gift altogether and would pull a $5 out of their wallets.

I have fond memories of those parties. I couldn't even name one single birthday party "theme." Nor do I remember a single birthday gift. But I do remember those parties! It wasn't about all the hoopla; it was more about family getting together. Ya see, I am from a very large extended family so I was related to most of the party guests. They were aunts, uncles, cousins, great-aunts, grandmothers, friends and neighbors (they were considered "family" back in the day), etc. -- all the people I loved and who loved me in one place for one afternoon.

So why do I do what I do for my children's parties?? I ask myself this every birthday "season." Maybe because my children don't have a large extended family? Or maybe because the family they have doesn't live close by? Could it be that I had my children so late that the aunts and uncles and friends are too old to party in the backyard? It makes me sad to realize that my kids will not really understand what it is like to come from a close-knit family.

The best friends I had growing up were my cousins. We ran in a pack and were thick as thieves. My kids see one cousin about 3-4 times a year, and never see the others. They do see their Aunt Donna weekly, and they absolutely LOVE spending time with her.

Anyway I look at it, my kids are missing out. I guess the lavish birthday parties are my attempts at "cheering" them (or me) up. They probably don't even realize that they are missing out on such wonderful relationships. But I know... I hope they will at least have fond memories of their parties and the love their mama poured into making those days perfect.