A is for Appalled...

and B is for babies' mamas!

I guess I probably should not have expected much better, but I am nearly (notice I said nearly) speechless!!! I recently received a baby shower invitation from one of my students. I was a bit surprised and taken aback, seeing as the girl has often heard me express my views about teenage pregnancy. Since I really like the girl as a person, I softened just a little and almost felt honored to be invited. After all, this must mean that I am an important person in her life. Right??

I've had showers before. You typically don't invite complete strangers or people to whom you are not related. I had several baby showers with my first child. Probably more than I should have, but each hostess totally insisted! Consequently, when making the lists of attendees, I made sure not to invite the same people AND I listed only those in my "inner circle" of friends and family. I was beyond excited to have the opportunity to share my joy with those closest to me. I had no expectations regarding gifts, and only registered after my out-of-town relatives insisted I do so.

Don't get me wrong; I am no Emily Post. However, I do not wear white shoes before Easter or after Labor Day, and I DO NOT host my own baby showers. Furthermore, I am appalled by people who do. I cringe each time I see that coworker (yall know the one) wearing white shoes in December. Worst than that, though, is someone who hosts her own baby shower. *** GASP *** (Lockard, are you reading this???)

You guessed it! The shower is being hosted by the girl herself. She printed her own invitations complete with a glamour-shot of herself (no cute ducks, baby bottles, or diaper pins) smack, dab in the center. At first glance, I actually thought I was receiving a promotional flyer from a local photographer. This, in no way, resembled any baby shower invitation I'd ever received.

The faux pas doesn't stop there, though. Included in the invitation was a small insert indicating where the baby's mama-to-be was registered. The registry, by the way, was not a suggestion. It was a DEMAND! She actually stated that guests were to ONLY (and she used all caps) purchase what was on the registry. FLAT. OUT. APPALLING.

My shock did not stop there, though. No! The insert went on to say that any guest who did not RSVP would not be admitted. What is this? A ball for the Queen of England?? Will there be security to escort any party crashers? God knows, EVERYONE loves a baby shower. I couldn't think of a better way to spend two hours of my Saturday afternoon than with a bunch of folks I barely know talking about epidurals and episiotomies.

In addition, the insert goes on to describe the decor of the baby's room (which I suspect is actually the teen's room with a baby bed in it). In the next sentence in BOLD letters with multiple exclamation points afterward was:

PLEASE, NO WINNIE THE POOH!!!!

Are you freakin' kidding me??? Mind you, this is someone with no job and no means to support a baby other than a minimum wage job held by the daddy. And don't even get me started on how quickly he'll probably head for the hills when he discovers how much having a baby can obliterate your social life!!!

I actually waited a few days before blogging about this because I was so mad. I've never been speechless before so this was a first. I am just curious about what person helped her with those invitations. She couldn't have done all of them by herself because it seems as though she distributed them to every person in the school. What about her mom or aunt or friend?? Did anyone look at it and say, "Oh, those look great! You should definitely make 4,000 copies and hand them out to random people on the street!"

If I weren't so darned disgusted, I'd probably feel sorry for the girl. Apparently, she's not learned the skills necessary to be socially acceptable in this world. Furthermore, her daughter will be the same way. Uggghhhh... Have I told you how I feel about teen pregnancy lately???