Vacation Observations

We're on vacation on the Gulf of Mexico.  Unfortunately, my kids haven't allowed me much time for blogging.  It's been up at dawn and down at dusk with a bunch of screaming, fighting, and crying in between.  Yesterday, my daughter literally held onto my leg crying while I check my email!  Dammit, you are seriously affecting my blogosphere!

Because I don't want a repeat of yesterday, I will have to make it quick.  I just wanted to jot down a few thoughts regarding some of the things I observed while stalking people-watching at the beach.

• Teenage girls are much fatter than I remember.
• Moms of teenage girls are much thinner.
• Just because they make bikinis in XXXL, doesn't mean you should wear one.
• If the string of your string bikini is buried somewhere between your waist and the top of your thigh, wear a muu muu instead.
• Some folks are racist.
• Teeth are not luxury items and should never be optional.
• That pool must be full of pee because I haven't seen a single kid go to the potty.
• If you want to avoid an embarrassing injury, be sure to lift your butt when going down the water slide.
• People are more tolerant of those who are polite.
• One day, she will regret getting that tattoo of the Eiffel Tower down the side of her entire leg.
• Dragons and daggers (or Mickey Mouse, for that matter) are not good examples of tattoo art. 
• I wish the makers of body wax would include men in their target market.  Back hair is gross!
• Put on some sunscreen; you'll fry out here!
• Those pina coladas from the Tiki bar are pretty strong.
• Be kind and wait your turn.
• Restaurant food, regardless of the cost, does not taste better than home-cooking.
• Cellulite of every color is an eyesore.  Please cover up!
• Tweens or teens caught wrestling in the baby pool/play area should be shot on sight!
• Parties of 15 or more people are obnoxious.
• The muffin top should be banned.  (Not the one found on a tasty pastry; the one created by tight, low-rise pants and a massive midsection.)
• Ice cream should be calorie-free so I can eat it every day.
• Build-a-Bear is for the children of the rich and famous.
• MarmaDuke is very funny.
• Yellow Box flip flops are still just flip flops.
• I just don't get Guy Harvey.  I'm more of a Claude Monet girl.
• Sleeping 4 to a bed is never, ever comfortable!

And I still have four more days!  Now, if my kids will only allow me a few moments to report back...

Nice!!!  Saw her at the water park yesterday.